I love pretending to be some kind of corporate defense attorney when I'm fighting 52 dollar parking violations (for supposedly blocking a driveway). But come on, lets get real PPA...we both know the only thing I was blocking was your next commissioned paycheck. and that got you all bent up your self-righteous ass. I'm convinced that people end up working for the PPA only because they don't have the balls to be a cop or the brains to be a lawyer. So they settle for a lifetime of petty bitch work...while (wrongfully) telling themselves they're serving justice for the greater good. Just one thing though...last time I checked, JUSTICE, doesn't come in the form of ludicrous tickets for "parking .75 inches out of the safe zone"...that's some minor shit.I've seen you guys lurking around the streets, desperately wanting to write someone up. And I've seen you guys having your own private meltdown when the people are abiding by the laws leaving you to be dispensable (and worthless). It's not my fault life gave you lemons...and my bank account can't handle your displaced passive aggression. I'm flat broke bitch, got nothing more than a couple dollar bills.
Basically, what it all comes down to is that I have to go to court because...I forgot to take out my yardstick and ended up parking one centimeter too close to a driveway. Uhhhhhhhhhhh. YEA! Ted Bundy, undeniably the most demonic serial killer of this century, will be out on bail by the year 2012. Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh?? WHAT!?
Realizations like these make me respect the conspiracy theories about the apocalypse. I better go to Genuardis and stock up on nonperishable goods...so I'm prepared for the end of the world. This ain't no Y2K threat ya'll...this the reeldeel.
Your new-age post-mod y2k-fearing, acronym-loving blogger,
Ely-V
